


I Say I’m Done But Then You Pull Me Back

by GuardianKarenTerrier



Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: 'Guardian wtf', 'hey cyrus ever been roofied', Angst, Emotional Scarring, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mind Control, Phanniemay, Sam Tucker Danny, because he is a lunatic, holy shit it's not fluff, it's for research I can explain, so I always kinda thought that was something Freakshow was ranting about, that line jesus freakshow, the show's ghosts clearly DO have friends, well mostly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-17
Updated: 2015-09-17
Packaged: 2018-04-21 04:37:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4815338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuardianKarenTerrier/pseuds/GuardianKarenTerrier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny's life has held a whole lot of horrifying things lately. </p>
<p>But nothing freaked him out as badly as Freakshow.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Say I’m Done But Then You Pull Me Back

 

“Well,” Freakshow said, circling Danny, a predatory gleam in his eyes. “This is certainly more than I bargained for. Amity’s personal ghost boy- and now he’s mine, all mine.”

Danny fought to move, to shout for help, to do _anything_ but stand there complacently, but it was like swimming upstream. Finally, finally, one foot slid slightly forward.

That slight movement left him inwardly exhausted. If he’d had control of his physical form, he would have been panting and on his knees.

Freakshow’s eyes narrowed. He thrust the staff forward again, directly into Danny’s line of sight. The boy’s knees buckled slightly, then straightened slowly as it felt like a heavy blanket had draped itself over his mind.

A voice cut through the hazy world. “I do need a new highwire act, and you’ll make a lovely Grim Reaper. Go and prepare for your new act, ghost. I imagine you’ll be performing it a lot.”

Nodding mechanically, Danny turned on his heel and left to get ready for his act.

Curled in the tiny corner of his mind left to him, Danny screamed.

The world wavered in and out of focus. It was faded, like an old photo; fraying at the edges _\- unreal_. The only thing that cut through it was Freakshow’s voice, and though Danny knew he hated that voice he could no longer seem to grasp quite _why_ , when it was the only real thing in a world of wandering shadows.

Or it was, until he saw Sam.

Sam. He _remembered_ Sam. He remembered her name. She was his best friend.  She was his _best friend_. 

Sam stood out vividly, vibrant colors etched sharply into a washed-out world.

“Sam?” Danny forced out, through a million miles and a lump in his throat the size of the entire Ghost Zone.

“Danny?”

And that was clear, her voice was as sharp as her colors, that was _his name_ , cutting through the static sound of the world, overwriting even Freakshow; this was Sam, this was his _best friend_ -

His view of his Sam was abruptly blocked by the red crystal shoved in front of his face. “What’s that? Is that… is that free will? Obey me, minion!”

If the mental blanket had been heavy before, this time it was weighted with lead and staked to the ground.

The whole world whited out, leaving Danny- just Danny- rattling around in his own head for a moment that could have been an eternity.

It didn’t fade back in this time. Instead, he heard Sam again, but she was fainter now.   “Danny, listen, you don’t want to do this! You’re being controlled!”

The words rolled around inside his head, but they failed to take on meaning. He knew he didn’t want to do this. Sam sounded scared, he didn’t want that- he’d never wanted to cause that-

-He laughed as he swung his scythe.

Sam’s scream was like an ectoblast straight to the center of his brain. He dove to catch her before he had really caught up to what was even happening.

“Don’t scare me like that!” That was clear. Mostly clear. It should have been clearer, should have been-

His mouth moved without his permission, the lingering part of him that had been increasingly mischievous ever since the accident blurting out, “How _should_ I scare you?”

Red flashed in his vision again, moving him away. The familiar voice faded away again, replaced by the one he hated. He’d lost another chunk of time somewhere. Where was Sam? Where had she-

He was beginning to seriously hate the color red. “Tell me, ghost. How are you fighting the staff? What gives you the strength?”

“Why should I tell _Sam_.” The words twisted as he said them. “It’s… because… it’s Sam, she’s my… she’s my friend, my best friend, she….” He stuttered to a halt, finally, the words dragged out of him enough to satisfy the ringmaster.

Freakshow’s face twisted into an enraged snarl. “Your friend? Your _best_ friend? You are a _ghost!”_ he shouted, furious. “Ghost do _not_ have friends!”

He shook with effort as he forced out through clenched teeth, “Sam. Tucker. _Sam_.”

The ringmaster slammed the staff into the ground, so close to Danny the wind ruffled his hair. “Ghosts! Do _not!_ Have _friends!_ ”

_Tucker. Sam._ But he couldn’t make himself say it out loud anymore.

Another blur. That tiny, private corner of his mind wondered hazily if he’d ever truly remember those stretches of time, even assuming he ever got out of this. He seriously doubted it.

Increasingly, on both counts.

It wasn’t until the train pulled away _did he just shoot at Sam and Tucker_ that he truly gave up. He wasn’t getting out of this; he’d tried. He couldn’t grasp enough concentration even to switch back out of ghost mode. He’d had vague ideas Fenton would be better able to fight than Phantom, at least in this case, but he hadn’t _been_ in ghost mode when he’d been caught, had he?

He was on top of the train the next time he was aware of his surroundings. “…Sam and Tucker! Your best friends, remember!” shouted the not-ringmaster voice.

And the staff was nowhere in sight.

Information trickled back into his mind, slowly, like a river fighting through a crack in a dam. “Tucker? Sam?”

Their eyes lit up. He _saw_ that.

Danny fought the part of his mind that was urging him to forget all about it, he was a ghost, he didn’t _need_ anyone. Even if he didn’t need them- and the hidden bit of his mind thought this was proving he _did_ \- he definitely _wanted them back._ “I…” help, “I…” need your help-!

He didn’t even register the red glow this time before it was too late. “Am a ghost,” he completed, because that was what had been driven so thoroughly into his mind. “I _have_ no friends.”

Another blurry bit of time, before- before the staff landed in his outstretched hand.

The staff, he had it, that was _important,_ why couldn’t he-

“- Bring it,” the ringmaster’s voice was cajoling. Not all of his words seemed to be getting through anymore. “Bring me my staff.”

Followed, far clearer, by, “Fight it, Danny!” I want to, I’m trying-! “He’s not holding the crystal ball anymore! _You_ are!” She was right, but it was still so hard to _think_.

_You’re a ghost, you have no friends. You’re just a spectral anomaly, anyway, no one will miss a ghost here and there. You’re not worth anything to anyone. No one is coming to save you._

What had Freakshow been _saying_ during those gaps in his memory, anyway?

Freakshow threw Sam aside. Danny’s hand clenched tighter on the staff. “Obey me, ghost! Give me my staff. Come on.”

Did he just throw Sam?

“I saw you up on that highwire. You were fighting him the whole time. Fight him _now_ , Danny! You’re _not_ just a ghost- _fight him!_ ”  

_I want to._ His eyes darted back and forth, rapidly. He wanted to listen to Sam. He wanted to fight.

He struggled to claw his mind free from the webs the staff shrouded it in.

“Quiet, all of you! I need to think.” If he could remember how to do so properly.

“Stop her!” Freakshow commanded, because of course no one was going to listen to _Danny_ , regardless of who held the staff. “ _Now!”_

“It’s the crystal ball, or your friends, Danny. Your choice!” Oh, how very much he wanted it to be.

When Sam slipped was when the mental dam cracked. “I didn’t mean that to be so literal!”

“Sam, no!” Tucker? He didn’t usually sound so worried, did he? Sam was falling, yes, but….

Sam’s human. We’re on a moving train. That’s a huge drop.

It still wasn’t a choice, but in an entirely different manner.

“Sam? Sam!” He dove after his best friend, staff slipping from uncaring fingers. He caught her- oh thank god, he caught her- and it was only as he flew back to solid ground that the forgotten staff shattered.

The dam burst. All of _Danny_ that had been shoved aside came roaring back. His memory was still indistinct and riddled with holes, but what he did recall made him think it might be best if those memories stayed gone.

“…you okay?” Sam was asking.

“I think so,” Danny answered, uncertainly, hugging his friend maybe a little closer than strictly necessary. “It’s all a blur. I… did some bad stuff, didn’t I?”

Sam smiled. “Nothing you can’t fix.”

Later, he let himself break down over it. Later, after their study session at Sam’s was over, after they’d all gotten back to their respective homes (and his room had _never_ looked so inviting), he laid in bed and stared at the ceiling and tried not to think about it. Then that gave him the creeps because not thinking about it had been so much of the problem, so he tried to think of something else. Anything else.

He wasn’t having any luck. His thoughts kept circling back to the circus and how close a call they’d had.

A rock hit his window. He got up and looked down to see Tucker, waving at him from outside.

Waving back, Danny phased through the floor and wall to greet his friend. “Tucker? It’s like two am, why are you here?”

“Dude.” Tucker crossed his arms and gave him a look. “You don’t honestly think we’re leaving you _alone_ right after _that_ , do you?”

Sam came trotting up the street, laden with a full backpack. “Sorry I’m late. I brought schoolwork, snacks, and some games.”

He had a lump in his throat now. “Guys.”

“Just fly us up to the Ops Center, dude,” Tucker took some bottles of water out of Sam’s backpack to lighten her load. “We’ll be here all night. We’re not going anywhere.”

Danny crushed both his friends to him in the biggest hug he could manage.


End file.
